Golden Joystick Awards 2006
How do the people who play games decide what’s hot and what’s not? By voting themselves in their droves to awards golden joysticks to the approved, that’s how! If you didn’t vote, shame on you; but there’s always next year. 2006 saw more than half a million of you voting! However, the question remains what exactly went down at the star-studded ceremony in London’s Park Lane Hilton, who won the awards and which journalists got extremely drunk. Kim Kaze made her way down there, and this is her story.
Beginning with a champagne reception during which everybody mingled (except me, who waited anxiously), the event soon got interesting as it was announced "If you’re staying for dinner, dinner is served!” Several people remarked that now would be a pretty stupid time for anybody to think about leaving, unless they literally came only for free champers. A few wanderings later, and we found ourselves sitting at table 15, between the good folks at Nintendo, Gamestation and EA. My table was hosted by Chocolate Communications, a great bunch of lads and lasses with a very pro active attitude towards gaming, including mobile gaming.
After chatting with Steve Boxer (a well known, long-standing journalist with particularly awesome hair that reminded me of Bowser) who was sat to my left about the plusses and minuses of the PS3 that the lucky sod has somehow acquired, we were served with more liquor and some starters. As the wine flowed and the food was brought forth, tongues loosened more and more, including my own. It was nearly time for the awards themselves and I heard several comments about ‘getting as drunk as you can to last through them’. Oh, the cynicism of my industry! I love it.
Fiona Haldane (PR Executive from GAME) sat to my right informed me that the award of special interest to her would be Retailer of the year, in which GAME were pitted against the might of Play.com, Amazon.com, Gamestation and others.
Kicking things off was fellow Bristolian Justin Lee-Collins; a mad character who some of you may know from his hosting of TV shows on MTV, Bravo and BBC Three, or perhaps his 1997 win at Glastonbury as New Comedy act. The whole thing was being broadcast live via the web site of Computer and Video Games magazine (CVG).
After a few well placed sexual jokes, it was time to crack on with the work. First award was the T3 Innovation award and this went to Xbox Live marketplace, with Nintendo coming in third and second with WiFi connect and Brain Training: How old is your brain? Groans from the Ninty table as more bottles with shiny caps are opened. I wished I could crash their table.
Then it was time for every guy in the place to fill his seat with dribble. The Sun’s family game of the year award was somewhat dampened by their less-than-family presentation including two very fit ladies not wearing a large volume of cloth. However, spirits on the Nintendo table were raised to the ceiling as Nintendogs took the accolade. If anything they opened more booze than before.
A table very near the front and off to the right were then filled with mirth – 2K Games wee’d all over the opposition as they took the title of best PC game of the year with their awesome RPG title, Elder Scrolls: Oblivion in the ebyer.com sponsored award. I don’t mean they literally urinated by the way … a figure of speech.
The following award was 1Xtra’s soundtrack of the year which appeared to be a closely fought battle. The winner was Need For Speed Most Wanted and folks behind us from EA were on their feet. Organised like an army, they sent up their three most facially vital characters for the camera pose down that every award seemed to generate. At some stage, Justin decided to go behind the staging to ‘do something’ and returned with his belt undone. Amusingly, he didn’t re-fasten himself for the rest of the evening.
After that, it was time for chick power as Lara Croft stole the accolade of PSW’s favourite gaming character (as voted by you, the fans, of course).
Xbox 360 official magazine sponsored the next award, Xbox game of the year. This was again, a closely fought group but out on top came 2K Games again with Oblivion! The happy chappies loved up the stage (and Justin) once more, before Bliss magazine pleased every female eye in the house with two MALE models as they awarded Nintendogs as Girl’s game of the year. Nintendo were back on stage again as more corks went flying. Ed & Sarah from Chocolate were getting into the fun of it I noticed, as was Rhianna Pratchett (Daughter of ex-journalist and Author Terry Pratchett of Disc world fame) on the other side of the table from me.
The Nuts magazine all nighter award went to Pro Evolution Soccer 5. By this stage we’d all drunken copious amounts of wine and the food was definitely sinking to the pit of my stomach, and there were several comments on the tables round about concerning Nuts. I won’t repeat them.
Playstation 2 Magazine announced the best PS2 game of the year as Resident Evil 4. Capcom’s Sam Brace got on stage and showed off his awesome, semi emo haircut. I was impressed. I also want to know what gel or putty he uses!
At random, one of the guys from Nintendo leapt across to our table to show off his … er … joystick. “It’s really heavy as hell, look! They actually made the base out of slate this year!” I never thought slate would excite a grown man in this way, but he seemed happy as hell to be holding an award. Nintendo were doing well tonight, so why not I thought?
Handheld game of the year was hosted by EDGE Magazine and went to GTA: Liberty City Stories. The folks at Rockstar showed us all how to party as they went up there – and why not? This is the fifth successive year that a GTA title has scooped a golden joystick. Nintendo’s own award was hosted by Official Nintendo Magazine and New Super Mario Brothers collected the award, in style.
Online Game of the year really could have been anyone’s guess, but Age of Empires 3 took the honour in the end. This award was sponsored by Intel, and as they were announced I heard some AMD fans in the room voicing their opinions, too.
Retailer of the year caused a stir on the table I was at as GAME took the award, with the Gamestation table beside us decidedly silent. Fiona exploded with applause as her fellows went up to collect their award. This one was sponsored by Sierra.
Publisher of the year had a bit more respect than some of the other awards, with a bit of a hush falling as the names were read out. In the end though, the howls of jubilation came from behind us as EA scooped the title. Comments nearby fell into the class of ‘It’s all those sports brands…Tiger Woods…you know how it is…’
Editor’s Choice, the only award not voted for by the gaming public, went to Ghost Recon: Advanced Warfighter which is an Xbox 360 game. This one sponsored purely by Future themselves, I guess.
When PS3 was announced not only as an entrant for ‘the one to watch’ next year but also as the winner of the accolade, there were opinions expressed at tables surrounding ours, and including ours. It seemed that someone thought the unit should have shipped two years ago, a ‘giant enemy crab’ was mentioned and I also heard someone comment that it got the one to watch award because the Wii was about to come out already, and the PS3 wasn’t. However, props to Sony for winning the award. They scored ‘massive damage’ with that one. Sorry - couldn’t resist. CVG also commented that Lik-Sang obviously didn’t vote …
Finally, the Ultimate Play.com game of the year 2006 was scooped by the night’s biggest success story, Elder Scrolls: Oblivion. With three joysticks to stack on the shelf at home, the boys and girls at 2K Games held the most gold, slate and alcohol by the end of another excellent awards ceremony. So long as you could stomach the comments about sex, skin diseases on your anus and many other crude gags from the Bristolian host, you should have enjoyed yourself.
As for the after show party, I ended up singing Ice Ice baby, watching journalists battle it out on Street Fighter 2 for a television prize, having my Gozian necklace broken and staggering off to a flat in the Clapham area after realising that I’d missed my train home. A night well spent, and well done 2K Games!
Beginning with a champagne reception during which everybody mingled (except me, who waited anxiously), the event soon got interesting as it was announced "If you’re staying for dinner, dinner is served!” Several people remarked that now would be a pretty stupid time for anybody to think about leaving, unless they literally came only for free champers. A few wanderings later, and we found ourselves sitting at table 15, between the good folks at Nintendo, Gamestation and EA. My table was hosted by Chocolate Communications, a great bunch of lads and lasses with a very pro active attitude towards gaming, including mobile gaming.
After chatting with Steve Boxer (a well known, long-standing journalist with particularly awesome hair that reminded me of Bowser) who was sat to my left about the plusses and minuses of the PS3 that the lucky sod has somehow acquired, we were served with more liquor and some starters. As the wine flowed and the food was brought forth, tongues loosened more and more, including my own. It was nearly time for the awards themselves and I heard several comments about ‘getting as drunk as you can to last through them’. Oh, the cynicism of my industry! I love it.
Fiona Haldane (PR Executive from GAME) sat to my right informed me that the award of special interest to her would be Retailer of the year, in which GAME were pitted against the might of Play.com, Amazon.com, Gamestation and others.
Kicking things off was fellow Bristolian Justin Lee-Collins; a mad character who some of you may know from his hosting of TV shows on MTV, Bravo and BBC Three, or perhaps his 1997 win at Glastonbury as New Comedy act. The whole thing was being broadcast live via the web site of Computer and Video Games magazine (CVG).
After a few well placed sexual jokes, it was time to crack on with the work. First award was the T3 Innovation award and this went to Xbox Live marketplace, with Nintendo coming in third and second with WiFi connect and Brain Training: How old is your brain? Groans from the Ninty table as more bottles with shiny caps are opened. I wished I could crash their table.
Then it was time for every guy in the place to fill his seat with dribble. The Sun’s family game of the year award was somewhat dampened by their less-than-family presentation including two very fit ladies not wearing a large volume of cloth. However, spirits on the Nintendo table were raised to the ceiling as Nintendogs took the accolade. If anything they opened more booze than before.
A table very near the front and off to the right were then filled with mirth – 2K Games wee’d all over the opposition as they took the title of best PC game of the year with their awesome RPG title, Elder Scrolls: Oblivion in the ebyer.com sponsored award. I don’t mean they literally urinated by the way … a figure of speech.
The following award was 1Xtra’s soundtrack of the year which appeared to be a closely fought battle. The winner was Need For Speed Most Wanted and folks behind us from EA were on their feet. Organised like an army, they sent up their three most facially vital characters for the camera pose down that every award seemed to generate. At some stage, Justin decided to go behind the staging to ‘do something’ and returned with his belt undone. Amusingly, he didn’t re-fasten himself for the rest of the evening.
After that, it was time for chick power as Lara Croft stole the accolade of PSW’s favourite gaming character (as voted by you, the fans, of course).
Xbox 360 official magazine sponsored the next award, Xbox game of the year. This was again, a closely fought group but out on top came 2K Games again with Oblivion! The happy chappies loved up the stage (and Justin) once more, before Bliss magazine pleased every female eye in the house with two MALE models as they awarded Nintendogs as Girl’s game of the year. Nintendo were back on stage again as more corks went flying. Ed & Sarah from Chocolate were getting into the fun of it I noticed, as was Rhianna Pratchett (Daughter of ex-journalist and Author Terry Pratchett of Disc world fame) on the other side of the table from me.
The Nuts magazine all nighter award went to Pro Evolution Soccer 5. By this stage we’d all drunken copious amounts of wine and the food was definitely sinking to the pit of my stomach, and there were several comments on the tables round about concerning Nuts. I won’t repeat them.
Playstation 2 Magazine announced the best PS2 game of the year as Resident Evil 4. Capcom’s Sam Brace got on stage and showed off his awesome, semi emo haircut. I was impressed. I also want to know what gel or putty he uses!
At random, one of the guys from Nintendo leapt across to our table to show off his … er … joystick. “It’s really heavy as hell, look! They actually made the base out of slate this year!” I never thought slate would excite a grown man in this way, but he seemed happy as hell to be holding an award. Nintendo were doing well tonight, so why not I thought?
Handheld game of the year was hosted by EDGE Magazine and went to GTA: Liberty City Stories. The folks at Rockstar showed us all how to party as they went up there – and why not? This is the fifth successive year that a GTA title has scooped a golden joystick. Nintendo’s own award was hosted by Official Nintendo Magazine and New Super Mario Brothers collected the award, in style.
Online Game of the year really could have been anyone’s guess, but Age of Empires 3 took the honour in the end. This award was sponsored by Intel, and as they were announced I heard some AMD fans in the room voicing their opinions, too.
Retailer of the year caused a stir on the table I was at as GAME took the award, with the Gamestation table beside us decidedly silent. Fiona exploded with applause as her fellows went up to collect their award. This one was sponsored by Sierra.
Publisher of the year had a bit more respect than some of the other awards, with a bit of a hush falling as the names were read out. In the end though, the howls of jubilation came from behind us as EA scooped the title. Comments nearby fell into the class of ‘It’s all those sports brands…Tiger Woods…you know how it is…’
Editor’s Choice, the only award not voted for by the gaming public, went to Ghost Recon: Advanced Warfighter which is an Xbox 360 game. This one sponsored purely by Future themselves, I guess.
When PS3 was announced not only as an entrant for ‘the one to watch’ next year but also as the winner of the accolade, there were opinions expressed at tables surrounding ours, and including ours. It seemed that someone thought the unit should have shipped two years ago, a ‘giant enemy crab’ was mentioned and I also heard someone comment that it got the one to watch award because the Wii was about to come out already, and the PS3 wasn’t. However, props to Sony for winning the award. They scored ‘massive damage’ with that one. Sorry - couldn’t resist. CVG also commented that Lik-Sang obviously didn’t vote …
Finally, the Ultimate Play.com game of the year 2006 was scooped by the night’s biggest success story, Elder Scrolls: Oblivion. With three joysticks to stack on the shelf at home, the boys and girls at 2K Games held the most gold, slate and alcohol by the end of another excellent awards ceremony. So long as you could stomach the comments about sex, skin diseases on your anus and many other crude gags from the Bristolian host, you should have enjoyed yourself.
As for the after show party, I ended up singing Ice Ice baby, watching journalists battle it out on Street Fighter 2 for a television prize, having my Gozian necklace broken and staggering off to a flat in the Clapham area after realising that I’d missed my train home. A night well spent, and well done 2K Games!
posted by -=Kim Kaze=- at
6:13 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home